Narrative Essay on Family and Friends

Published: 2021-07-01
1974 words
8 pages
17 min to read
Wesleyan University
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Dont do that! Stop! I said no! These were some of the terms I heard all time while growing up when I found myself doing something wrong in the eyes of my parents. My parents taught my siblings and I the difference between right from wrong at a young age. When we did something wrong, there were consequences, and when we did something right, there were rewards. This is where the development of morals and ethics first started. As we get older, the exposure to different things influences our moral and ethical development than when we were young. According to Dr. Kohlberg, childhood moral development is broken down into five stages infancy, toddler, preschool, ages 7-10, and preteens and teenage years; and I could not agree more with his breakdown. From personal experience, this is something I witnessed with my daughter (Kohlberg, 1981). When she was

Stage 1 = infancythe child's only sense of right and wrong is what feels good or bad;

Stage 2 = toddler yearsthe child learns "right" and "wrong" from what she or he is told by others;

Stage 3 = preschool yearsthe child begins to internalize family values as his or her own, and begins to perceive the consequences of his or her behavior;

Stage 4 = ages 7-10 yearsthe child begins to question the infallibility of parents, teachers, and other adults, and develops a strong sense of "should" and "should not"

Stage 5 = preteen and teenage yearspeers, rather than adults, become of ultimate importance to the child, who begins to try on different values systems to see which fits best; teens also become more aware of and concerned with the larger society, and begin to reason more abstractly about "right" and "wrong."

Church and Religion (Christian)

Growing up in church and religious belief has had an influence on my moral and ethical development. I have grown up in a religious family where everyone in the family had to go for church services. Having grown a religious environment, I was taught Christian values while very young. Whilst in the church I was taught what was wrong and right according to the bible. I remember my Sunday school teacher constantly giving us narrations of how individuals who obeyed and were loyal to God in the Bible were rewarded as well as how those who disobeyed God were punished. Furthermore, I was also taught that people with good morals belong to God while those with bad characters or morals belonged to Satan. this infringed fear in since I always wanted to be associated with God and thus thrived to act in a manner as was taught in church so that I could not experience Gods wrath for disobedience. What made me even more religious was my participation and engagement in church activities. It is in a church where I learned about the societal values, how to treat others as well as how to go about different aspects of life. I strongly concur with Ofsted (2003:14) argument regarding moral development. Ofsted describes moral development as the building of an approach or rather framework of moral values for teenagers or pupils which regulate their personal values. He further stipulates that the development of teenagers understanding of societys agreed and shared values and that the values of the society change and that there are also contagious issues that can bring a long disagreement requiring teenagers or pupils to develop an opinion of the different possible views. from Ofsteds argument, it can be deduced that religion emphasizes expectation in peoples moral development and focusing on Christian and normative values and highlighting areas of possible disagreements and how to go about them.


The military focuses on the professional and personal development of every individual. Upholding the values of honor, courage, and commitment has contributed to my growth both personally and professional . Spending over 16 years dealing with military personnel and their families had contributed to my personal and professional development. We must complete various online courses to help with our development as well as in the classroom courses. Every time an individual transfers to a new location you must attend a class that is focused solely on your professional and personal development at your new location. As a Navy Chief, my responsibility is to actively teach, uphold, and enforce standards and measure myself by the success of my Sailors. I must remain invested in the Navy through self-motivated military and academic education and training and will provide proactive solutions that are well founded, thoroughly considered, and linked to mission accomplishment.

1. Being deployed away from my own family, adapting to various culture

Experiences that contributed to my personal and professional development

Life Lessons

Personality traits are developed early on but can change as a person matures (Coleman, 2003). While culture and environment serve to heavily influence these traits from the very beginning of ones life, life style and experiences continue to do so even when adulthood is reached (Coleman, n.d.). Leaving home at the age of 17 and finding my way with little to no experience as an independent adult was not easy. I was going to the military, and it was more than just about my morals and ethics, I know I had to conform to the Navys morals and ethics. I had to live with the Navys core values or honor, courage, and commitment. Deploying on a Navy Vessel was one of the best experiences for me and contributed greatly to my personal and professional development. I was no longer a teenager who had her parents there to help her along the way. I was the adult, and I had to grow up fast otherwise it would have affected my professional development.

Becoming a single parent while stationed away from family with little support was another life experience that greatly shaped my life. After completion of the Navy training, I was stationed at a location far from where my family was. I became a single parent. Becoming a single parent came in with a lot of responsibilities. I had to balance between work and taking care of the young child. This was no doubt the hardest task. I was in a foreign place and got little support from my family. I had to work to provide for my child. My work was also very demanding and sometimes worked in shifts, and some of the shifts were night shift. I, therefore, had to get a nanny to help me with babysitting. However, I had to be cautious as I was in a foreign land and could not trust anyone. I gained much from this experience; I learned how to plan for time and balance between work and family. I became more hardworking and sometimes engaging in side hustles to increase my income and sustain my family. Furthermore, I became much more responsible at a young age. I also learned how to manage stress since the child was sometimes was very troublesome. I was able to pass the morals I learned while growing up to my child.

Losing four relatives in less than 2 years and learning how to cope with the losses so closely also influenced my personal development. These periods were very emotional and traumatizing to me. I lost my close relatives in a span of fewer than three years. It was not simple as they were very dear to me. During these periods I learned how to cope up with losses of close relatives. The first loss had the greatest impact as it was the first experience of losing a close relative. I was traumatized, and my wellbeing was greatly affected, my productivity reduced, had no feeling for sleep or eating. It took almost six months to recover from the loss. for the subsequent, the pain of the losses was not as much as the first as I had experienced that before and learned how to manage it. From the losses, I learned how to manage losses and quickly recover from them. I learned losses used to greatly affect me in all aspects including my productivity at work. However, I came to learn that once dies it cannot be reversed. Thus I have to move on quickly and continue with my life.

A. School

Getting a college education is very helpful when looking for jobs in the community. Going to learn about Navy was a door opener for me as I immediately completed my studies I got stationed and started earning a living. While in school I not only gained skills related to the Navy, I also learned about life skills.

Getting an education allows you to see the various points of view not only for yourself but others as well, especially as a future counselor who will encounter various cultures, different beliefs, morals, and ethics. My career as a Navy officer involves interacting with persons from different cultural backgrounds. I was able to learn how to interact with people from diverse cultural backgrounds while at college and this gave me a smooth sail in my career now as a Navy officer.

Legal and Ethical Issues in Counseling as they Relate to My Ethical Autobiography

A. Confidentiality

Confidentiality is imperative for counselors because it helps build a solid foundation with their clients. Being a Navy officer requires brevity, an individual who can make commands and the commands be obeyed without question. I used to be shy, I, however, learned how to be brave with time and can as at now I believe I am confident and can make commands as I best understand my work.

It is important to understand what Ethical Standards protect you when it comes to confidentiality and the protection of not only your client but also yourself as a counselor (American Counseling Association (ACA), 2005). While in school I was able to learn useful insights regarding the required ethical standards. Gaining this insight helped me in building my confidentiality as well as understanding how to carry myself while at work.

B. Boundaries

1. As a counselor, we must remain professional and be sure not to cross boundaries. This leaves less more for clients to take advantage of our services and respect us as a counselor. I learned about the boundaries that I need to keep and the limits which I am not supposed to exceed.

2. Boundaries are essential for healthy relationships and put them in place during the beginning of the counseling sessions. As a counselor, there are limits that I am not supposed to exceed. I was able to learn how to maintain these boundaries and how to go about situations where the client wants to exceed his or her boundary.

C. Transference/Countertransference

1. Transference can be very helpful for a counselor to change how a client feels about himself or herself (Cottone, 2000). I am tasked with binging back to a stable state an individual that is troubled, to successfully attain this I have to put myself in the clients shoe and feel what he or she feels so that I can be able to offer informed advice.

2. Countertransference is not always helpful for clients and can sometime interfere with treatment plans (Burwell-Pender, 2008). Having understood the context of usage for both Transference and Countertransference, I will place precedence in using transference than Countertransference.


A. Why has this Assignment been meaningful?

This assignment has been insightful as I have substantially gained a lot of knowledge that will be of significance in practicing my career. It has opened my scope and made me research on more aspects that I was previously not well conversant with regards to counseling .

B. How does this assignment contribute to your development?

1. Gave me a starting point on evaluating my moral and ethics development to ensure I understand what I can and cannot do as a future counselor.

2. I was able to do research on ethical standards and laws that are in place as a future MCFC.

C. How can ethical and legal practice influence social change?

1. Ethi...

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